Tuesday, May 02, 2006

shopping

So, I have been feeling a little down lately about many things...One of them being my appearance. I don't like to talk about this because I know that there are people who REALLY struggle with low self esteem when it comes to their "image" and for the most part I'm not one of them. So I never want to over dramitize my feelings on the issue or belittle someone who struggles with this more then I do.

However it is growing problem. I have consistently gained weight since my gullbladder surgery. Being a mom of a young child cuts money for hair and makeup as well as time for the basic things like a shower! I work with the cutest people ever which makes me feel worse. I don't want people to think I don't care about myself or to think that I'm oblivious to the fact that I go to work everyday looking like I just rolled out of bed and put on whatever I could find off the floor...I'm painfully aware of the way I look...I just don't have the energy to change it!

In an effort to feel better Mark said I could get some clothes from Old Navy (we are broke but I have an Old Navy credit card that I leave at home in a filing cabinet because when it comes to credit cards I can not be trusted!) If you know Mark you know that this is a big deal for him to let me buy clothes on a credit card! I'm very thankful. So Mom and Kim took me there today and we all had high hopes. Oh my goodness...I think I was in denial about home much weight I had actually gained! At first I tried on some fitted shirts that were long enough to cover my tummy but they were to snug and only highlighted the tummy. So I tried on a bunch of clothes that were lose and flowy in an effort to hide the huge tummy. Unfortunately they just made me look bigger...like 9 months pregnant bigger! It was disappointing to say the least. I ended up finding some plain t-shirts and capris that were more comfy then cute but at least I will have clothes to wear this summer that fit. I hope this experience will motivate me to work out and get things under control..for my health as much as my appearance.

So anyways that is my story. In my head it was more interesting and entertaining then it turned out. Too bad I don't have any pictures of me in the moo-moos now that was entertaining! =)

P.S. it was fun going shopping with Mom and Kim and I do like the stuff I ended up with. Anyways...it's more practical for me to wear comfy clothes when I'm chasing after Malachy before and after work!

3 comments:

Crystal Starr said...

Steph I know that I have told you this a million times so maybe you’re sick of hearing it. You ALWAYS look cute to me, ALWAYS! I think you look just as cute if not cuter than people you work with (because they are all mostly younger than you and you look the same age as them, not because they aren't cute.)

Anyway, I know what it feels like to just feel like you don't measure up. So I am really glad you were able to get some new clothes to make you feel better. New clothes almost always make me feel better. I had to buy a shirt for the family pictures and it was just a simple black shirt (I bought 2 different ones actually) and I wear them everyday because they make me feel better. I have put on 40 lbs since I had Madison and my stomach is so beyond gross and huge.

As far as your hair goes it's just the cutest hair ever! I love it down, or up, or curled, whatever you do it looks cute.

Sorry for rambling on and on I just wanted you to know that you are cute and you are also valued cute or not. I blame Helzberg for this!

And how hard is it to be a woman this day in age, everywhere we turn we see naked thin big boobed women and not just in magazines anymore either. Everywhere you go it’s like a big runway porn show (can you say Woodfield Mall!!!).

Now I’m just venting. Steph just know you are one hot mama!!!!

Crystal Starr said...

I'll let Steph fill you in about Helzberg.

On the topic of gall bladders, Scott went to see Dr. Cronin last night because of some severe pain he has been having on his right side. The Doc said it could be because he has a GB stone. He has to have a ultra sound and a chest x-ray. It also could be nothing though.

How are you today Steph? Are we having small group?????? I know for sure that I am going to stay away from that fish food they call a green tea latte.

Anonymous said...

i think you're very sexy just the way you are stephanie,

love,

one of the "cute" people you work with