My favorite Emily

This is Emily and Frank (not Frankie-doo) at their B-day party this fall

I posted this as a comment on Amy's blog:

Hi, this is Steph, I'm a good friend of Crystals. I just called their home and talked to Emily's Grandma, Carrie. If you are like me I'm sure you have been checking the blog all day in hopes of some news and I know Scott will post later tonight and share all the details if he can manage to stay awake. =) But I thought Crystal would want you all to know that Emily is out of surgery. Your prayers were and continue to be appreciated. It sounds like Emily is recovering now which is good but the surgery was more complicatd then expected and was 9 hours long. I can't imagine poor Crystal in the waiting room that long. I'm heart broken I couldn't be with her but she has an amazing family that is supporting her right now and all of your friendships and prayers have blessed her and Emily more then words can communicate. I don't want to mis -communicate anything so I will leave the details to Scott but I got the impression from Carrie that we are still confident Emily will make a full recovery but the day wasn't as smooth as expected. So please continue to keep everyone in prayer.

Thank you so much.
In Christ,
Steph Stanger

Student Ministries Conf.

Sooo...day one went well. I may have blown my ear drum out at the Third Day concert. Mark asked me to grip for him (wrangle cables for his shoulder cam) and Mark was stationed right in front of the 4 stacked sub-wolfers, stage left, that Third Day had brought. It was like full blown gusts of wind, Yikes! The concert was great, I wish I could have paid better attention.

Husband said he saw Novelli talking to the band in the green room, so apparently he wasn't lying when he said he knew them. =) I myself got to talk to Mac when they walked in the door but didn't even realize it was him until I heard his voice...these things happen to me.

The earlier part of the day went well! Crowder was great! I missed the messages because I was trying to get some work done but I hear they were great!

Here is a picture of Husband and I on the LED's while video and lighting got squared away in between sessions.

Noah and Lauren

Please remember Noah and Lauren in your prayers this week. Noah will most likely be leaving this week and he only gets one hour notice! I can't imagine the stress of having to be ready at any second to leave like that! Pray that they would have peace and be able to enjoy the week. Also OBVIOUSLY pray for continued safety for Noah while in Afghanistan!

(I don't have a photo of just the 2 of them from the wedding on my computer, so you get to enjoy seeing Mom and Dad all dressed up too!)

Learned something new today...

Sandy and Alan are super good to me! They knew I was feeling a little blue so they bought me some iris to work today to cheer me up! We had talked several weeks ago about how those are my favorite flowers! Sandy is also having a stressful week because of conference madness and broken foot!! (that she keeps dancing on!) So I felt super special that despite her crazy life right now she took the time to show me love!

So later on at home I was putting the flowers in a vase. Malachy really wanted one so being the sucker I am I gave him one. He ran all over the kitchen with it laughing and sating flawa as best her can. Then Kim said what's wrong with Malachy's face and I said nothing. Upon close look it was pretty red and splochy but I ignored it. A few minutes later I picked him up to change his diaper and he still had the flower. I noticed his face was all broken out, his eye lids were puffy and the veins were popping out. (Malachy was fine though...he showed NO sign of discomfort) Mark says maybe the boy is allergic to pollen so we take away flower and he slowly got better! Strange huh!?? He's allergic to flowers! I wonder what this will mean come spring! He didn't seem to have any problems last spring. Neither Mark or I have any allergies. I should ask the doctor if it is something I need to be concerned about.

after work

I was so frustrated after work today I had an anxiety attack! ( I was not upset over anything that happened at work just some "personal" stuff that was stressing me out and hurt my feelings) Anyhow, that had never really happened to me before. It was like needles pushing into the back of my throat and there was nothing I could do to make it stop. I was coughing and my eyes were watering and it hurt really bad. Yuck! I hope this does not become a pattern!

This week is a stressful one for sure. It is the Next Gen conference mon-wed. Which means I will be working 12 hour days AND skipping my days off this week. I also have to prepare for the Promiseland Conf. Which includes having my stage layouts done by Thursday. Stage layouts I make on a program I barely understand, Visio. Also, I have to prep for my weekend( the "real" part of my job). Emily is having her surgery Tuesday and I really wanted to visit her and Crystal at the hospital. Noah is leaving between now and Friday. I HAD hoped to send him a "pre" care package before he left but there is NO time to put one together and make it to the post office to overnight it.

UGGHHH...could this explain the anxiety attack...no, it was actually something else! But, I can see more coming!

Oh. My point! My point was....after work in an effort to distract myself from my self pity and anxiety we took Malachy to Chuck E Cheese's (where a kid can be a kid). Kim, Mark, and Dad joined in on the fun. We got a little more "fun" then we bargined for. The place was packed and pretty crazy. It was a good time though. Malachy enjoyed some pizza and all the "rides". Here are some pictures:

Where I'm at

So I haven't kept up the last few days because I have been busy and sleepy! It's 10pm now and I need a shower and bed I will have to save the tape of American Idol and Survivor for tomorrow!

This past week has been strange! I have been super mood swingy...I'm not sure if it's hormonal, seasonal, lunar or what...I always try to explain my moodiness so I don't have to accept the fact I might just be nuts! This week I have even considered post-poning my efforts for baby 2 so I could get myself on some happy pills (the legal sort)! With Noah going overseas I know my anxiety is going to shot through the roof! Anyhow, with all that said...every time I have focused on God's love this week it has made a huge difference!! I went to work super grumpy Wednesday and in a staff meeting we looked up bible verses and it changed the course of my day. God's words really are life to me! (it works...The Bible) The truths I posted earlier this week have stayed with me and have sustained me and given me joy. I feel like it has been a good week despite my own lack of emotional stability! I know I'm extremely blessed and I never want to take that for granted.

Lord God, put your words in my mouth and cover me with the shadow of your hand-You who set the heavens in place, who laid the foundation of the earth, and who say to Your children, "you are my people." Isa. 51:16

I liked this one because of the "put your words in my mouth" part. Lately I feel as if many of my friends are going through challenging times and I never know what to say. I want God to put His words in my mouth!

I feel within myself a deep-rooted resistance to proving anything to anybody. I don't want to say:"I will show you that you need God to live a full life." I can only say:"For me, God is the one who calls me the beloved, and I have a desire to express to others how I try to become more fully who I already am." But beyond that I feel very poor and powerless. - Nowen

Keeping up with my Small group prayer thing...

Ok so before I go watch Desperate House wife's and Greys Anatomy...here is a word from the Lord...or... to the Lord anyways

O'God please set my heart at rest in your presence when my heart wants to condem me. For you God, are greater then my heart, and you know everything. (Prayer derived from1 John 3:19-20)

I like that one because it combines 2 of my favorite truths: There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus and we can't even trust our own hearts!

"every time you listen with great attentiveness to the voice that calls you the beloved, you will discover within yourself a desire to hear that voice longer and more deeply. It is like discovering a well in the desert. Once you have touched wet ground, you want to dig deeper." Nowen

Small Group

In our small group we are studying a book called Praying God's word. There are weekly topics that we pray for God to give us strength in. (that's the easy way of explaining it) We are all so busy that sometimes we have a hard time doing our daily prayers so we have decided to try and post them on our Blogs when we can to help encourage accountability with eachother and more importantly with ourselves. Sooo....if you see random Bible Verse/prayer things on my Blog then you will know what is going on!

This week we are praying about over coming the insecurity of feeling unloved. I think that is a great one because I know that is one of the biggest lies the devil wants us to believe because it makes us weak. When we feel fully loved and confident in our identity in Christ we are MUCH less likely to struggle with pride and be obedient because we don't care what others think. WE also will have the joy and hope that God intended us to have. The Bible tells us we are to live for God's approval alone and not mans. There is freedom in God's unconditional love. Henri Nowen speaks about this beautifully in his book Life of the Beloved. ( I highly recommend it!)

"...though the experience of being the Beloved has never been completley absent from my life, I have never claimed it as my core truth...I kept refusing to hear the voice that speaks from the very depth of my being and says: You are my Beloved, on you my favor rests. That voice has always been there, but it seems that I was much more eager to listen to the other, louder voices, saying: Prove that you are worth something; do something relevant, spectacular or powerful, and then you will earn the love you so desire. Meanwhile, the soft, gentle voice that speaks in the silence and solitude of my heart remained unheard or, at least, unconvincing."

So anyhow here is my verse/prayer for today:

Lord God, help me not only to fully accept how much you love me, but help me to abide in your love. (John 15:9)

Please pray...

For those of you who may be visiting my Blog and somehow haven't heard... our super friends Crystal and Scott are having a very challenging week. Their daughter Emily, 9, has been diagnosed with Papillary Thyroid Cancer. This apparently is a "good" cancer to have. However, it is unimaginably terrifying to hear your baby has cancer. Please keep them all in your prayers. Emily will have to have her thyroid out in the next couple weeks. She is one of the bravest girls I know. They are in the process of finding a endocronoligist (I have NO idea how to spell that!) and getting ready for the surgery. Pray for peace and courage for the whole family and that they would find a good doctor. And obviously pray that Emily will get well! Also pray for Emily's brother Frank,8. I'm sure this is a strange time for him. Kim may be annoyed with me posting this...but...she told me that when we were little and I had my eye surgery she remembers wishing she too could have surgery because it was hard for her to see me getting all this special attention. When your that young it's hard to understand these things! So please remember the whole Kunze family in your prayers. They are like family to Mark, Kim, Malachy and I and we love them all so much (even little Madison who may someday marry my little Malachy) !! You can visit Crystal or Scotts blog for more details or to give them some much appreciated encouragement!

I have been meaning to post this for awhile...

This was the house warming present that Noah and Lauren got us way back in october at a truck stop on their way into town....

This is how Malachy felt about it...

I'm feeling alittle better...Kim just told me I need a shower....hmmmmm...I guess I better go get on that!

I'm so sad right now I may actually vomit

Things I learned in NY....

when going to NY in Feb. bring wool sock and boots! Military men wear their hats extremely tight. Turkeys and porcupines can climb trees. In case of nerve gas exposure you can pee on your socks and cover your nose and mouth with it....

Our new Hats!

Malachy and I got cool Army hats with our names on the back just like Uncle Noah! Malchy LOVES his!! I keep putting it on his head and he gets all excited and touches it! It's sooo cute!

More fun NY pictures....

Noah "helped" me with my pancakes at the Golden Unicorn. We snuggled with the puppies! Played some games, tried on Army gear and had a great time!

Good times at Ft. Drum

We had a great time in NY with Noah and Lauren!! We did many fun things...we went to the Golden Unicorn where we experienced some hometown flavor!! They have a huge pancake meal where if you finish it you get a t-shirt!! I tried-ish but there was no way. Noah has done it in the past!

Lauren made us tons of yummy food! My favorite was the lasagna and the bannana bread!! Lauren is an awsome cook!

We went bowling! Mon almost beat Noah! I did the worst of course.

Here is the family portrait Lauren took for us before she drove us to the train station in a blizzard!!

Amtrak delayed

Ok so apparently there is a BIG storm in NY and Boston further East then we are....so our train has been delayed 3 hours and counting. Also we were informed that the train will be full. We experienced a full train when we came to NY this past summer and it sucked!! Think of crying children on mothers laps, overflowing toilets with NO toilet paper! And being squished like sardines into a tin can. So needless to say I'm not looking forward to this ride home!

I can't wait to see Malachy and Mark too!! That is what will get me through this.

I really miss Malachy!! I just called Mark to talk to him but he's sleeping. Mark must be playing video games because he wasn't interested in talking to me at all....oh well. It's nice visiting with Noah we have had a really good time.

I am going to New York...upstate

Sooo...In a few hours Kim, Mom, Dad, and I are going to NY to see Noah and Lauren! Noah is stationed there currently and will be shipped out to Afghanistan for over a year within the next month. Noah only gets 24 hours of notice before he leaves so we couldn't really go and send him off. This is the best we could too because this weekend is his 2nd to last "for sure" weekend here in the states! Please pray for us as we travel 13 hour train ride there and another 13 hours home...yikes!

Also pray for Mark who will be a single parent thru Tuesday! Not only does he have Malachy but he is also responsible for Kim's 3 cats and 1 of Moms!! And I have no idea why but he agreed to serve at Impact this Sunday with a 6:30 am call time and he is taking Malachy!! He is nuts!

Laurens sister Meg is watching Malachy Saturday so Mark can work then too!! Thank goodness for Meg! Poor Malachy is going to have a tough couple days though please pray that he will feel safe, secure and loved!

Talk to you when I get back! Steph

Nice weekend!

I forgot to check the box where it tells the pictures to be centered...opps! Anyways, other then the random pic of Noah and Malachy (that I just had to share) these pictures are from the Promiseland Production Super Bowl Party. Where I was forced by Kevin to spend more then I was budgeted of the churches money on cheap pizza!! It was a good time. Malachy has so much fun! It was in Blue Sky 2 (the 3 year old Promiseland room) so there were many toys to entertain Malachy! (thats not to say Mark and I didn't do our fair share of chasing after him) It was a real busy weekend but a good one at that. Today we slept in and ran some errands. Also the heating guy came and checked the furnace and water heater. He informed us that both were "OK" but already had out lived their life expectancy and where pretty old...great! Houses are fun! Tomorrow we go to the Little Gym and I start on my huge task of things to get done around the house so I'm ready to go to NY! By the way... thanks you to Lauren and Crystal who sent me encouraging e-mails after my last post. I really appreciate both of your friendships!
This first one is of Noah and Malachy from when Noah was last home.



















This next one is of Malachy eating pizza all by himself like a big boy!



















Here I am cuddling with Arnez and Katherines daughter Noe...
they have the 2 cutest kids who I adore!














This is my programer Sandy and her man Alan who is my super volunteer. Mark and I really enjoy them and wish we had more time outside of work to hang out with them!














This is Malachy and Noe in one of the many toys we got out.

I found this quote on a blog Kim linked to recently...

"History will have to recall that the greatest tragedy of this period of social transition was not the vitriolic words and the violent actions of the bad people, but the appalling silence and indifference of the good people. Our generation will have to repent not only for words and actions of the children of darkness, but also for the fears and apathy of the children of light." --Martin Luther King, Jr.

I was surfing blogs yesterday and came across some women's blogs who were bashing celebrities for dif. Things they have said and done and I just thought... who cares. Why do you feel so defensive and angry about that? Why can't people get angry and vocal about the millions of starving and under- educated children. Why can't we use our passion to make ourselves heard on the things that matter. Why are we so insecure that we let little quotes from celebrities throw us into heated rants. Why can't we find our identity and confidence in Christ alone and live out of that amazing grace?

another powerful quote I heard yesterday that made me think was:
You can know how much of a servants heart you have by how you respond to being treated like one.